My dad always told us that if you look like you have somewhere important to be, no one will question what you're doing (that's how we sneaked a bunch of chairs into an outdoor concert with a strict no-chair rule. We're such rebels.) But he wasn't just telling us that to get us to stop looking around like we're guilty of something. He was telling us to be confident!

And that bit of advice applies in your every day life (my dad is pretty wise that way, even if he doesn't always mean to be. ;-) ). There are going to be plenty of times where you're so totally unsure of what you're doing. And feeling that way is okay sometimes! But if other people see your weakness, they can help pull you down further (and face it, there are people who thrive for that kind of thing.)

It's not all about pretending to be confident, though. You have to learn to actually be confident. If you can't fully stand behind yourself, who else will?

I believe it was my friend Katie who told me a bit of advice her dad always told her. It was something like, "Don't look at the ground. Predators don't look at the ground, the animals they eat do." I probably totally butchered that (sorry, Katie and Mr. Hogan!) and maybe she can correct me after posting this, but do you get the meaning there? If you stare at the ground as you walk, you're just going to be attacked.

If you're in a tough spot such as, say, being bullied. Do you think those bullies are going to stop when you start feeling worn down? Of course not. That's their goal, so they'll keep going until they succeed in making you feel as miserable as they do. But if you show confidence, if you show them that you're happy with the way you look or the way you act (even if you aren't completely happy and what they are saying does get to you), the novelty of it will wear off to them.

Even if you're not being bullied or anything similar, confidence is an important trait to have! It goes hand in hand with my entry on accepting yourself. If you accept yourself, you're likely to be happier, but without confidence, you're missing the point. When I say accept yourself, I don't mean "I accept that I'll never be as skinny as that person. Oh, well. What am I going to do about it?" NO! Don't be like that at all! You need to be like, "Ya know what? Maybe I'm not that skinny, but who cares? I am beautiful and so is every curve on my body!" Without the confidence, the acceptance may as well not be there. Accept yourself with confidence!

So hold your head up and walk with determination and no one can stop you.

Love,
Lindsey

I apologize for the lack of posts lately! But I am here!

It seems today that fewer and fewer people like who they are. Whether it's a physical trait or a personality trait, something's always wrong. "I wish I was skinny!" "I'm too sensitive!" "So-and-so would like me if I looked more like this." It's as though it's impossible to be happy with oneself! Even when others tell them "Oh, you're so gorgeous!" or "You're such an amazing person, I'm glad you're my friend." they still doubt it.

Ya know, I used to do the same. I used to look in the mirror and wish I looked a little different. Or I'd wish I could be more outgoing instead of being so shy. But one day (and it was no particular day) I looked in the mirror and accepted myself. I accept that I am me and no one else. And honestly? Life is so much better after that.

Think of it this way: In the entire universe, there is only one you. Just one. There is absolutely positively no one else that is exactly like you. And that is an AMAZING thing. You are entirely unique, even other people have the same outfit as you or the same favorite movie. You are you and no one else!

So stop focusing on and hating your flaws and accept them as part of the millions of little things that you consist of. Love yourself!

"Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You." -Dr. Seuss.

Love,
Lindsey

Last night, I started thinking about something that has been gathering dust in the back of my mind: my novel. I've had a terrible case of writer's block for months (not to mention the fact that the laptop with all of my work on it was stolen with only parts of it backed up elsewhere, but that's irrelevant). Much of what caused the writer's block is that I feel it's missing something in the plot. Something major that would give it that "umph!" that draws the line between "just another amateur" novel to "sitting on the best sellers shelf" novel. I'm still not sure what that is. It will require a ton of digging through the mind of my narrator, I'm sure. But I think I've decided where to begin. Time for a rewrite.

And ya know what? I'm okay with that. I'm okay with starting virtually from the beginning. Plenty of authors have done this and, with most of them, I'm sure, it's the only way they were able to make it. Starting over is NOT a bad thing.

The same applies to life. Sure, you can't just hit a backspace button to delete things like when typing a story, but you can make progress by taking a few steps back.

Going down a path that makes you unhappy is pointless. Do you hate going to college? Why suffer through another three years because other people have? Maybe you'd be happier going straight to working. Maybe you'd be happier going to a different college that suits you better. Either way, you won't know if you're too scared to try.

Of course, you have to think logically. You can't just quit your day job to follow your lifelong dream of you have bills to pay or a family to support, but that doesn't mean you can't work toward your dream while still working your regular job.

So, if you feel like you're going no where or if you feel so unhappy with your life story? Start rewriting.

Stay Alive!
Love,
Lindsey

I write today's entry with the great Martin Luther King, Jr. in mind. I realize Martin Luther King day was yesterday, but, upon reading this, you will see why this wasn't written yesterday.

Dr. King was and still is a great inspiration. To me, what he did is a great example of why it's important to take action. He stood up and fought for what he believed in. Who would have cared if he just sat at home and was like "It'd be great if we could all just get along. It's possible!"? No one because no one would even know his thoughts, even if they were great. Nothing you think about doing matters if you don't actually do it. Get up, take action!

This doesn't only apply to things like what Dr. King did. It applies to every little thing. Sunday evening, my husband started feeling really (and I mean REALLY) sick. He had no clue what was going on, but he was in a ton of pain. Based on what we've heard and Google (because Google is definitely a licensed physician), it sounded like kidney stones. We tried to wait it out so we could call the doctor in the morning. Well, a few hours later, he rolls over in bed and says, "I'm thinking of calling an ambulance or something. It hurts that bad." I said "Alright, get up. We're going to the ER." And I hopped out of bed, put the baby in her car seat and helped him get ready. Turns out he had appendicitis and got surgery last night. What if we had waited it out? That appendix could have ruptured. I don't even want to think about what would have happened then. But that DIDN'T happen. We took action. We got up at 3am and went to the ER even though both of us just wanted to sleep (and the baby was already asleep!)

So what's the point of this rambling post, you ask? Think about your life. Is there something you want to change or need to do? Is there an ex you need to rid yourself of? Are there certain could-be laws that you're SO against that it makes you feel sick? Then do something about it! Delete (or block if that doesn't work!) that ex's number. Sign a petition or start a movement like Dr. King did! Just take action!

If you don't do something, you'll never change the world.

_
"Be the change you wish to see in the world." -Gandhi

When my daughter Emmalyn was only five days old, she was put on oxygen. For the first few months of her life, we were constantly rushing to the ER and going through hospitalization after hospitalization because she would periodically stop breathing (even now, at 5 months old, she sleeps with a monitor that watches her heart and respiratory rate). When most parents are stressed to the point of pulling out their hair because their new baby won't stop crying, you know what I was saying? "At least she's breathing."

Now the point of that? I looked at the positive side to get myself through the hardest trial of my life thus far.

When feeling down, there is one thing that is always poison to the mind: looking only at the negative. Don't forget there are always two sides to the story and that includes a positive and negative. You're never going to get out of the darkness you're stuck in if you refuse to see the light--or at least the light switch. (What was it that Dumbledore said? "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.")

So when you're feeling down? Just look up. Find that light switch and remember to turn on the light.
And remember. At least you're breathing.

Love,
Lindsey

The page is still pretty new and we've had no comments yet, so I figure I'll write a blog so the page isn't dead.

We all go through hard times. No one's problems are insignificant because someone else is going through something different. If it matters to you, it matters. But one thing you have to always, always, ALWAYS remember when going through hard times is that it's going to be okay! Maybe not now, maybe not even tomorrow or next month, but it will work out for the best.

So what does that mean? Fight. Fight for your life, your sanity. Never EVER give up on yourself because you're going through a hard time. That's the time you need you the most.

When you really feel like giving up? Forget everything. Pop in your favorite feel-good movie. Go take a nap. Go for a walk. Take a bubble bath (with NO distractions or triggers if you self harm). Read a book. Just take time for yourself and forget the world. Forget those problems bringing you down. Sure, eventually that movie's going to end or you're going to get tired of reading, but ya know what? Didn't that break feel so great? Remember that feeling when you get down and let it help you through.

I write this entry with a few people in mind (one in particular, but for privacy's sake, I won't mention her name). I just want to tell those people, and all of you reading this, that everything will be alright. I wholeheartedly believe that. Everything. Will. Be. Alright.

Until next time, Stay Alive.
Love,
Lindsey

Welcome to Stay Alive!

On this website, I believe we are going to do our advice via blog. What I mean is, if you have an issue you'd like advice with, just leave a comment and one of us will write a post helping you out! Who knows, we may all three chip in! If you prefer to just rant, that's fine too! Just leave it in a comment and we'll read it!
If you prefer a private place, we do have a closed Facebook group (see links). Just request to join and only other members can see what you post.

All in all, we really just want to help people and I really hope you all help us get started!

Stay Alive!
-Lindsey